i love you and my weed i smoke loves you too boo....<3
Q: How do you know you are a true stoner? A: When your bong gets washed more than your dishes!
Police Officer: "How high are you?" Pothead: "No officer, it's "Hi, How are you?"
Q: What do you call a pothead with two spliffs? A: Double jointed.
Q: What do you call one bowl between three tokers ? A: Malnutrition.
Q: Why is the roach clip called a roach clip? A: Because pot holder was taken
Q: What do you call a stoners wife? A: Mississippi
Q: What is a stoners idea of a balanced diet? A: A joint in each hand!
Q: What did the stoners girlfriend say? A: If I can't marry a dude, i'll Mary Jane
Q: What do get when you soak a spliff in Vodka? A: The Holy Spirit!
Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign? A: The drunk guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
Q: What do you call a stoner when horny? A: A weed wacker!
Q: How do you get a one-armed stoner out of a tree? A: Wave.
Q: What did the frog say after lighting up? A: Don't Worry be Hoppy?
Q: What do you get when you eat marijuana ? A: A pot belly
Q: How do you know when you have smoked enough pot ? A: When you start looking around for the directions on how to use the lighter.
Q: How do you know your a pothead? A: You studied five days for a urine test?
Q: What do you call a pothead that doesn't inhale? A: Mr. President.
Q: What's the point of a weed wacker? A: Weed wackers need to wack it too!
Q: How do fish party ? A: Seaweed.
Q: Why did the pot head plant cheerios? A: He thought they were donut seeds.
Q: What do you call a person who remembers what they did at woodstock ? A: A Liar.
Q: What do you call it when a roach ash burns your shirt? A: A pot hole!
Q: What is Reality? A: An illusion caused by a lack of good weed. A stoner called the fire department and said, "Come quick my house is on fire!" The Fireman asked "How do we get there?" The stoner says "DUH, in a big red truck!"
Q: How many potheads does it take to change a lightbulb. A: Screw it, we got lighters
Q. How long does it take before a pound of weed goes bad? A. I don't know! I've never had it longer than an hour!
Q: How do you hide pot from a hippie? A: Put it in his work boots.
Q: What do you called a doped-up Pikachu? A: Tokemon!
Q: What is the difference between politicians and stoners ? A: Politicians don't inhale...they just suck.
Q. What do you call a stoner that just broke up with his girlfriend? A. Homeless.
Q. What's the difference between a stoner and a tweeker? A. When a pothead is driving down a road he is driving about 20 mph and eating the upholstery. When a tweeker is driving down a road he is driving about 200 mph, and talking to the upholstery.
Q. If there are two potheads in the back of a car, then who is driving? A. The cop!
Q. Why did the stoner cross the street? A. His dealer lived on the other side.
Q: What do a bad football team and a pothead have in common? A: They both get blitzed!
Q: How do you hide money from a hippie? A: Put it under the soap.
Q: What do a quarterback and a pothead have in common? A: They both get blitzed
Q: How many Stoners does it take to change a light bulb A: Who cares man, its to bright in here anyway!
Q: What do you get when you eat too much hash brownies? A: A pot belly
Q: What is a stoner's favorite dream? A: Getting so high he can eat a star.
Q: How did the pothead burn his ear? A: He answered the phone while ironing his clothes
Q. How do you get an one-armed hippie out of a tree? A: Hold out a joint!
Weed is good, weed is fine,
If you share your weed, ill share mine..
I smoke weed every day and night
I've smoked so much that i cant see light
I can not see, I can not smell ...s***
I'm in tha beggining of a ****ed up hell!
If u think hell is worse then life
Then if I was you I would pick up tha knife
Stab thyself prepare to cry
But tha key objective is:not to die!
I failed that objective
So im going to die
This is tha end of my rhyme
So i gotta say bye!!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke a little leaf,
Jack got high and dropped his fly and Jill said "Where’s The Beef?"
Smoking Weed Is Fun To Do I Bet One Day You’Ll Do It Too A Bong A Blunt Maybe Even A Joint They All Get You High, Get My Point So With One Single Puff, As You Take It All In This Is Where The Fun Begins I May Be As High,As High As The Sun But Who Gives A **** Its Not Hurtting No One Some Say Its Bad, Like All Other Drugs But You’Ll Say **** It Once You Look At These Buds With These Few Last Words I Tell You My Friend Light That Blunt Up And Let The Fun Begin Stoners live and stoners die, But in the end we all get high, So, if at first you don't suceed, **** this world and smoke some weed. I was here, but now I'm not, I'm round da corner smokin' pot! I've wrote this message to prove a point, Life is s*** without a joint!